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redkneck

Bullying..... What say you?

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Personally I'm sick and tired of hearing about it, and fed up with folks being charged with crimes and facing jail time for doing it. I mean now I see that the parents of one of the girls charged in that bullying case that's going around the media circuit maybe be charged for allowing the kid to post a bullying comment on FB!

What the crap happened to free speech? Even if it is in poor taste I feel the right to be distasteful should be protected. I'll probably be bashed for this post, lol but the forums can use the occasional long argument thread these days :saber:

I don't feel that a kid that makes a comment that is cruel to another person that is perhaps already suffering from depression should be held responsible for that person's suicide.

Now what say you? :boo:

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I've never been a victim of bullying and have never bullied people while I was in school - But until you experience it first hand, I believe you have no right to go as far as saying those types of comments.

Your comments come off as you being a shallow inconsiderate human being.

Everyone has the right to free speech, yes, but to say that people shouldnt be punished for bullying someone to the point of commiting suicide is just wrong.

Would you say these types of comments if your son/daughter committed suicide because they were bullied? No.

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No I'm not naive to say that I would not have a different opinion if my daughter's had bullying problems, far from it. We are all shaped by our life experiences. It's just that this seems to be such a major theme in our life these days. The fact is young immature kids can be and have always been mean. The difference is that these days parents let their kids live their lives through social media. Used to someone could be called a "dork" and it was no big deal, though I never did, I would have more likely been called a dork lol. But these days they're called something bad on FB and it quickly becomes public to the entire school and plays out in a magnified way that will kill a kid's reputation. We should be teaching our kids to deal with these things appropriately and letting criticism roll off their backs, rather than blaming others.

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No I'm not naive to say that I would not have a different opinion if my daughter's had bullying problems, far from it. We are all shaped by our life experiences. It's just that this seems to be such a major theme in our life these days. The fact is young immature kids can be and have always been mean. The difference is that these days parents let their kids live their lives through social media. Used to someone could be called a "dork" and it was no big deal, though I never did, I would have more likely been called a dork lol. But these days they're called something bad on FB and it quickly becomes public to the entire school and plays out in a magnified way that will kill a kid's reputation. We should be teaching our kids to deal with these things appropriately and letting criticism roll off their backs, rather than blaming others.

Your OP made it sound as if you were talking about bullying leading to suicide rather than the simple "you're a dork" type of comment.

The types of things that "get magnified" are generally the things that really do need to be magnified. The stories you hear the media airing are generally extreme examples of bullying that have gone too far, it's not just a simple "saying one thing bad on FB" type of comment that gets it magnified.

Sure we should teach our kids to stick up for themselves and let it roll off their backs - But these days it's FAR worse than a simple "youre a dork" type of comment and the kids that are being bullied really do need help.

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I don't get the whole cyber bullying thing. If somebody on a forum or Facebook says something about you and you don't like it, then don't go to that sight. It seems like a simple solution to me. The majority of today's younger generation are so out of touch with reality due to computers and smart phones, that they don't know how to handle negativity. All of this technology seems to make kids more vulnerable, and they put themselves in bad situations.

Did I get bullied when I was a kid....yea. I went to about 8 different schools, I was skinny, had big ears, thick glasses, wore hand-me-downs, and we were poor so I was an easy target. As I got older I'm sure I bullied a few people myself. I don't remember ever going out of my way to bad-mouth anybody, but I'm sure I offended a few people. I guess to me it seems like part of growing up to a certain extent. You learn to deal with it, to fight back, and that it doesn't matter what the cool kids think of you in the grand scheme of things.

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I think these days we're too politically correct and bend to every complaint. my dad used to tell me if someone hits ya, hit them back. be aware if you hit them first there's consequences to your actions and you won't like it. people now, like I got from my mom, are told you don't do anything and go tell someone and they'll get in a whole world of trouble. I think that leads to a poor development of character, one lacking confidence and/or self respect. however, bullying is wrong. kids these days can and will be cruel as ever and have tools better suited to be that way. you treat others how you want to be treated. that said, if I found out my kid(s) (when I have them) were bullying someone all that is fun in their little world would come to an end... quickly. I was a pretty non-confrontational kid growing up, never wanted to get into trouble, but the older I get the less of a tolerance I have for being a jerk. we've got enough problems in our lives. we don't need us or someone else adding to them.

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Speaking as a middle school teacher, bullying is a far cry from what we knew in school. The social media, video games and todays "Thug mentality" has taken bullying from being beat up for lunch money to destroying peoples lives.

I'm in a inner city school and we participate in the Olweus program. Already we see a difference in the attitude of the kids. Gone are the survival of the fittest days for kids. Now they are more caring. No one is called down to the office for being called a dork. That remark is just silly. But if your kid was pi$$ed on in the locker room and it was video taped and Youtubed, you wouldn't start threads like this.

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But if your kid was pi$$ed on in the locker room and it was video taped and Youtubed, you wouldn't start threads like this.

Yeah, good point Joe. I suppose maybe I'm out of touch with today's "bullying". And fwiw the OP wasn't to make light of bullying or suicide, I know better than most what suicide does to a family. Just starting some conversation. I see where a 12 year old girl is arrested and facing jail time for being stupid and saying mean things and I suppose I dont get it.

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I see where a 12 year old girl is arrested and facing jail time for being stupid and saying mean things and I suppose I dont get it.

If she's getting jailed for it... It means that she deserves it. She would not be getting jailed for being stupid and saying mean things - She is getting jailed because she took things to the extreme, Like Ranger pointed out (not just the simple "youre a dork, etc")

It seems as if 12 year olds these days act like the 18 year olds did when I was in high school - But the 12 year olds have not learned that there is a limit and how extreme they take it can ruin peoples lives.

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Yeah, good point Joe. I suppose maybe I'm out of touch with today's "bullying". And fwiw the OP wasn't to make light of bullying or suicide, I know better than most what suicide does to a family. Just starting some conversation. I see where a 12 year old girl is arrested and facing jail time for being stupid and saying mean things and I suppose I dont get it.

that's part of the problem. jail time won't make her change and besides she's 12. if it's been that much of a problem for that long then why wasn't it corrected before and let get to this point. things can't go on that long and get to that point with someone being tipped off that something is up. it's like people could careless and shrug it off as not a big deal then until someone is judged then they're fighting to get first in line to tear the antagonist a part. at that point the damage is already done.

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Yeah, good point Joe. I suppose maybe I'm out of touch with today's "bullying". QUOTE]

Man, maybe I'm out of touch with it too. Where is the line between bullying and assault. If pi$$ing on someone and putting it on youtube is todays version of bullying, then we have a bleak future.

Edited by MUDRUNNER

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Yeah, good point Joe. I suppose maybe I'm out of touch with today's "bullying". QUOTE]

Man, maybe I'm out of touch with it too. Where is the line between bullying and assault. If pi$$ing on someone and putting it on youtube is todays version of bullying, then we have a bleak future.

Man I was thinking the exact same thing and was going to come back and add that. That is no doubt assault and is terrible, but not the behavior I had in mind when I started the thread. I have no idea what the girls in the latest case have "allegedly" done, but my original thoughts were that we are going to far if we are in fact jailing folks (immature kids) for posting mean things on FB. I guess that was really my original point. Physical abuse and humiliation are a different matter.

Just seems like kids are pushing each other to a breaking point these days bc they are allowing themselves to be done that way. I don't do FB so I suppose I'm ignorant as to how people are caught up in their cyber image. Take four guys and bully one kid until he breaks, he comes back with a gun to school and kills them, we call him the agressor and the four the victims. Let him jump off a bridge instead and he is now the victim and we want to hang the other four.

Any way you slice it it's very sad.

Just my thoughts for the day, shallow as they may be. :)

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I think one big problem on both sides of the coin is lack of accountability. The consequences for doing bad stuff these days is almost non-existent. Kids get away with way too much, and with no worries about the consequences they just keep pushing the envelope. If these problems are dealt with at home and at school when they first arise at an early age, things might not get be so far out of hand when they are teenagers. I also think that it's the parents responsibility to be aware of what your kids are doing online.

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Speaking as a middle school teacher, bullying is a far cry from what we knew in school. The social media, video games and todays "Thug mentality" has taken bullying from being beat up for lunch money to destroying peoples lives.

I'm in a inner city school and we participate in the Olweus program. Already we see a difference in the attitude of the kids. Gone are the survival of the fittest days for kids. Now they are more caring. No one is called down to the office for being called a dork. That remark is just silly. But if your kid was pi$$ed on in the locker room and it was video taped and Youtubed, you wouldn't start threads like this.

You have got to be kidding me. Thats bullying? Wow..I thiught you either got beat up or someone called you some names.

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Kids can be cruel, guess intents of cyberbullying could be tough to prove. Take into account that too many kids in todays world are overly sensitive due to political correctness and maybe it could be possible that some sick pukes try to push another kid they know is weak over the edge. Yes, in those situations I think there should be some degree of accountability. Then you have those that are desensitized from reality, seems to maybe be greater extremes than there were when I was a kid. I could see kids deliberately trying to push another to suicide and when that happens they should be punished.

What happened to the days of getting in a fistfight and it being over, nowadays kids come back with gun or start off with a gun. That is lack of parenting, sad reality in todays world too many kids don't have any real parenting. A society where instead of parents teaching right and wrong kids watch stupid u tube videos and think what they see is acceptable.

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Like Ranger I too am a middle school teacher in an inner city school setting. I am a special education teacher so the opportunity to be a bully or be bullied, depending on how the student handles his/her disability, is even greater. The problem is is that adults dont know what bullying is anymore because kids can be so discreet with it. The other problem is is that kids have way too much freedom to use phones, computers, etc. Parents need to monitor this better and not spoil their kids with the latest gadgets.

Kids are also not taught respect anymore because of the lack of maturity of many parents. These are the problems that should be addressed. When it comes to punishing the bully though, if he/she made the choice to have that much impact on another person's life, he/she can pay the price for those actions. And lastly in the incident that just happened one of the two girls went as far as to post negatively after the girls death. That takes a special kind of sicko who definitely needs to be punished.

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I really have no idea what being bullied is like these days with cyberbullying going on. They're saying this happened to an extreme in the case your talking about. With cyberbullying a group can bully a person relentlessly...24 hours a day...7 days a week and include unwilling participants in it with todays technology. I can't imagine what kind of effect that's going to have on a child.

Didn't have to worry about all that when I was growing up. It was more face to face. Was I bullied as a child? Yep...sure was...once. I was taught treat others like you'd have them treat you. I put up with this bully's actions for about a month until the straw fell that broke the camel's back. I put an end to it with a bang! Never had any problems with him again or anyone else.

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I think the another problem with being bullied is the fact that no kids can stick for themselves anymore and fight back. Heck the kids that stand up for themselves get in trouble for doing so. Let them knock the bully in the mouth. Thats how I was taught and I was bullied quite a bit due to my last name but I guarantee you one thing it wasn't more then once by that person. I will raise my daughter that way and if she gets a detention for sticking up for herself I'll sit in that room with her the whole time. Rant over

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Bullying..... What say you?

Bullying these days is nothing like it used to be. These days with all the FB and twitter stuff. Things get bad quick. One person can out right demoralize a person quickly and it spreads like wildfire!!! When it used to be as simple as moving schools to protect your child, it's not that simple anymore. Everyone in the county knows the going on's.

Let me let you guys know how cruel these so called children can be.

These days there's photo shop , so we had our " ya mama's so fat jokes" these days they photo shop a child's mom having you know what with either someone else's parent or animals so on so forth, then post them or text them around. To me that constitutes jail. Believe me it happens.

These days fights are not school yard fights that end when it's over with a hand shake, peeing on the other person is not uncommon.

And then there's FB, this is a means for everyone to see you getting picked on and see that you may be the weak link or the odd ball so they all chime in so that the attention stays on the other person and doesn't turn to them. ( needless to say I'm not a FB fan, one comment with the wrong inflection can change many things quick)

My BIL and SIL are 13 & 14, I hear the stories, I see the comments. My aunt is on the school board, I hear the things that they hide to make you think your child is safe. Do not get me wrong this doesn't happen everywhere but it happens here.

I believe in get punched, punch back, and stand up for the weak ones. Isn't that what this country was built on ????

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Bullying..... What say you?

Here's my take on it and I hope to be brief.... Bullying has changed a lot on recent years and we all know why. Here's a concept some people I know just don't get... Facebook and Twitter need to be restricted from younger kids and for heavens sake does anyone else notice that there are fewer and fewer family dinners anymore? It's all about the Xbox and computers... If parents would sit down with their kids and actually paid attention to them most of these underlying issues would be noticed and could be dealt with. If your kid is a punk and you don't care, don't whine when I show up on your porch and shove my fist down your throat. If your kid is being bullied and you don't step in as a parent and help him or her out, then your not teaching your child how to be more mature and your taking away from how they will handle it with their kids.

Do I feel parents of bullies should be punished for their kids stupidity??? Not 100% of the time. If the parents have been contacted repeatedly by schools, coaches, law enforcement, or actively encourage their spawns bullying behavior then yes. However more and more I feel kids are being sheltered and protected from a good old fashioned a$$ whooping and call me old school but the words "wait til your dad gets home" did scare the crap out of me. Start punishing the kids and make it hard on em...

Nobody wants their kids to be picked on and nobody wants there kid to be a punk bully either. Setting aside family time for social networking won't keep the kids on a straight and narrow and it won't keep you in the loop on your children's behavior either. I tell my kids you better never throw the first punch but if knuckles start flying you better defend yourself, and I tell them they are to never pick on another kid but are expected to stand up for the morales and ethics instilled into them.

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I think the another problem with being bullied is the fact that no kids can stick for themselves anymore and fight back. Heck the kids that stand up for themselves get in trouble for doing so. Let them knock the bully in the mouth. Thats how I was taught and I was bullied quite a bit due to my last name but I guarantee you one thing it wasn't more then once by that person. I will raise my daughter that way and if she gets a detention for sticking up for herself I'll sit in that room with her the whole time. Rant over

Whitetailfreak is an awesome last name buddy... Where you go to school PETA State???

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I keep reading these posts and wondering how I don't know about people beinf bullied like this.

I grad high school in 09 not that long ago but I swear it wasn't like that. Maybe it was who I was around ornwhatever. We went huntin, fishin or ridin 4 wheelers. But its an eye opener. I can see what mt brother could go threw. Not that he gets bullied we don't talk about personal stuff.

But I find this just sickening. I guess I'm a young guy that is not to in touch with the socail media. Sure I use facebook and twitter some. But I rarely get on it. I'd rather build something or go hunt. Im really out of touch with what's going on

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Good comments, it is an eye opener reading about how far some kids have gone to make others feel like crap. I guess I'm with you Cody, I just don't see that going on around here, but no doubt it does I'm sure. My girls are 14 and they are still not allowed on fb, and I don't think I want them there any time soon lol.

Just my limited experience which is solely watching news reporting over the last few years it always is reported the same, one party bullies another online, the bullied commits suicide, the posters ate held liable for the death.

The behavior is despicable to say the least, people that post such things deserve a foot up you know where, but it always seemed from my perspective the bullied had the opportunity to just not log in to read the comments.

But I suppose in this age with fb, twitter, and God knows what else there's no way to ignore what every kid passing you in the hallway is reading and snickering about.

Gives me a better perspective.

Edited by redkneck

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